Success; the great unraveler

Success is great. I mean, to a certain extent that's what this blog is about: how to get some.

Success is something to strive for, something that can give us fulfillment, enjoyment and provide a sense of worth to us. Still, you can have too much of a good thing.

"Moderation in all things" - Terence (185-159 BC)

Our capstone skills and talents can lead us to ignore parts of our lives that aren't as successful. Really, who  wants to spend time on things they are only marginally good at, when they get phenomenal feedback from being a star at something else?

Picture by kevinthoule

Instead of working on our weaknesses, the weak link in our chain, we focus on our strengths. Sometimes this means we spend more time doing what we do best or like to do most, and less time doing the things we have trouble doing. We spend less time with the people and areas that aren't directly part of our success.

Unfortunately, this just makes us feel less capable and more awkward at the things that are a challenge to us, and we isolate those parts of our lives, focusing more and more on what we do well. This cyclical effect does real damage to us as people if we don't take steps to drastically put it in check. We can lose friendships, forget our principles, get worn out, lose our sense of purpose, and eventually even our satisfaction in what we do so well will slip from our grasp.

Like it or not, we do rely heavily on the other areas of our life, and they can indirectly help us focus our success even better, giving us energy and strength to fall back on. These too make us who we are, and if we ignore them, they will fade.

Being a one show wonder can actually make us more insecure as well. Studies show that people find it harder to take criticism that are completely focused on the area they are being criticized in. In comparison, those of us who are invested in multiple areas of our lives can take a step back, look at the big picture, and then make use of the feedback given. It is harder to be objective if you are totally committed, and being able to harness and sift through feedback, not just taking the good and the bad, but being able to realistically separate accurate and applicable feedback, and make use of it, will do wonders.

There is an absolutely fantastic article about this by Van Velsor, E., & Leslie, J.B., on "why executives derail".

The moral here? Success is good, but we can make ourselves even better by improving ourselves in each area of our lives. Take a meander down soul lane and invest in diversification.